Hitherto Unknown Secrets !



Every married woman wishes that her husband be always under her spell ! To fulfill this desire of theirs ,women seek many tricks and tips and try various ways !  To make women understand the the veracity of such attempts Mahalaxmi resorts to a question to Draupadi !

Once while in Pandavas were in  vanavasa , Srikrishna along with Satyabhama [ avatara of Srimahalaxmi ] visited them ! Satyabhama while sitting near Draupadi , asks her

“Draupadi  you have five husbands ! You are a pativrata of highest degree , Even Lord vedvyasa has declared it in full sabha of Dhritarashtra [ Hastinapur ] ! now there is no doubt on this topic ! Your husbands are very powerful ,they can be compared  in valour with LOKPALAKAs . Your husbands always stay together as joint family . They never think of even separating . To maintain such a family is impossible . But you seem to be at very ease in maintaining them . This is very surprising to all the people in the world . Its difficult to get along well with one husband itself , patiently getting along well with five is a great feat ,how do you manage this ? There is not a single instance of Pandavas having angered on your behaviour or getting upset with you . They never go against your word either ! They have no complaints about you at all ! Not a single reason for dissatisfaction among them ! Their faces are testimony to all these. What is the reason for this extreme cooperation among them towards you ? Do not hide anything ! Let me know everything ! Let me the real secret ! I too want to apply the concept on Srikrishna  and keep him under my Control ! Such mighty Pandavas are under your sway for this you must have used some trick ? What could be this trick ? is it MANTRA ? or is it a MEDICINE  ,a CONCOCTION  ? or is it some VRATA ? or is it due to special bath in some river or pilgrimage ? or is it any special VIDYAA ?  What is that trick that has enabled you to enslave your husbands ? LET ME KNOW ? “

Draupadi replies “ Oh MOTHER ! You are ALL KNOWING ! DOUBTS , QUERIES do not emanate for the fully knowledgeable person ! YET your query is not for the clearance of doubt , many satvik people have these doubts and you want them to be clarified through me and hence you have asked this question ! AND thus it is my duty to answer this ! FIRST OF ALL THE QUESTION IS NOT CORRECT ? IT IS EVIL TO DESIRE TO KEEP THE HUSBAND UNDER CONTROL OR UNDER OUR SWAY OR ENSLAVED !  Applying tricks to achieve these is still more evil ! To think this way and women thinking as such are evil personified ! To answer such women is itself a sin ! satvik women under the influence of evil women should never apply such measures !

The moment any male gets a feeling that his wife is applying certain measures to keep him under control via mantra medicine etc. ,that very moment fear enters his  mind . He gets a feeling that he is in fact living with a poisonous snake in the form of his wife everyday in his house . He fears even to enter the house !  One who is ever gripped with fear , how can he be peaceful ! Peace is not possible for him even in dreams ! One who is not peaceful how can he ever be happy ?

Many feel that pleasure objects , sense objects and material prosperity are the fundamentals of happy life . This is fallacy .  Those who are materially prosperous even they are not happy , this is widely experienced in this world ! Even if materially not prosperous, still there are people happily living the life , even this is seen in this world through experience !Thus I feel that peace is most important and fundamental to the happiness and joy in this world . If husband is not at peace then how can wife live peacefully ! That peace will be a mirage ! SO any women who wishes to be happy and peaceful will never think of enslaving their husbands or apply measures and  tricks to keep them under control ! And just by mantra husband cannot be under control , its not possible forever !

I will tell you my own day-to-day lifestyle , this can be taken as sadachaar ! Sadhvis must tread the way that enhances saumangalya ! I will humbly  present  before you  [ rather recite what I know like  a good student before a teacher , as MAHALAXMI is all knowing] the methods that are fundamental to soubhagya !

What is not desired by the husband I never desire them at all . My husband cannot be without me , this feeling I never harbour . I do not have pride on account of my high birth , my beauty my lustre , my youth or my wealth . Pandavas have other wives also other than me . I look at all of them with respect . I do not think of other men nor do i look at them . I eat after Pandavas have eaten , I take bath after the have taken their bath . I sleep after Pandavas have gone to sleep and also after all the servants have completed their work and meals .

When my husband returns after a tour ,forest or their work , I welcome them with smile and a happy fame of mind . And knowing their tiredness , i arrange for water to wash their feet, arrange beds and chair and other furnishings to relieve their travel fatigue .

I use the appropriate vessels for appropriate work ! I sincerely lookafter their cleanliness. I cook varieties of food items in interesting manner and feed my husband and other dependents at appropriate times . I keep tab on the grains and stock in an updated manner . I see to it they do not get wasted or spilled everywhere . Time to time keep the household clean and sanitised . I never speak to anyone in a demeaning manner . I see to it that my words never hurt my husband . I do not resent anyone with words and deeds . I do not entertain or associate with evil women at all . For dharma and its application association of evil women is detrimental . I never show laziness with respect to dharma and my duties towards my husband .

I do not laugh without reason . I do not stand at doorstep at every second . I will never stay alone in uninhabited place . Will not wander alone inside as well as outside in gardens . Do not speak much . Always wear a happy look . Do not disturb others in their work . never laugh at workers , nor speak with extreme even if there is a fault . I would never make others angry too . My speech brings good to satvikas and my husbands service is my worship . Without husband even a second is waste for me .

When husband leaves the house and town for some work , i do not use flowers and perfumes and articles of decoration . I keep various vrata and niyam during such periods . Even if I like certain things I would never go for it if it doesnt suit my husband’s taste . I forego such food and clothing voluntarily .

I sincerely follow all that is told to me by my husband for my own good . I decorate myself  for the happiness of husband and accompany them in their hobbies and works that are of interest to them . I take part in their ventures .

I listen to my mother in law and her sermons with utmost sincerety and bring them into action as per her directions . I follow utmost care and sincerety during bhiksha bali and shraddha and other preparations of santarpana. I stay in front to welcome the respected and elders . And whatever dharma I know ,I follow it with niyam . And during such attempt and practise I forget even day and night in carrying out my duties .

I strongly believe that wife should be under the shelter of husband and to she shoudl carryout it with full enthusiasm .Husband is  a devata and husband is the wealth for women , so for such loving husband which women would not spend a lifetime .

No women should try to surpass husband . This is detrimental to her siddhi . so in clothing etc i do not wish to surpass husband . I do not talk ill of mother in law . I keep utmost care in this issue . I never behave in a uninhibited manner before elders and always take note of their words . Looking at these qualities my husband always like to listen to me . I need not go for any special tricks to keep them under sway and control .

My mother in law is a qualified lady . qualified with many good qualities and auspicious too . Just by the fact that she has given birth to such valorous sons good with many auspicious qualities is pointer to her soubhagya  and greatness . Kuntidevi is steadfast in TRUTH . This fact is ever present before my eyes . I do her service personally , under no circumstance do I delegate my duties with respect to her to anyone . Her food , dinner ,medicines , service  everything i personally do it . I beget extreme satisfaction by doing this all through the day . My mother in law PUTHADEVI is equal to PRITHVI herself when it comes to patience .

In my Husband’s house first everyday 8000 Bramhins eat in golden plates . Then 80000 graduate students [ bramhins ] and then 80000 gramhasthas have their food happily . Apart from this Yudhisthir has 100000 personal assistants . each has 30+30 dasis  . All these peoples welfare and food and other responsibilities Yudhisthir has given it to me ., part from this 10000 yati[ sanyasis ] also eat daily in our household .

After the vaishvadeva of all these bramhins, Then family members eat . This default sequence is never missed and I look after these arrangements everyday . These bhojan [ food distribution ] happens with all gait ,pomp and respect . I personally give all of these bramhins , ahaar, tambul ,vastra and dakshina  everyday with devotion and respect to the satisfaction of each .

There are special dasis for Dharmaraj , they are one LAKH in  number , they wear thick gloden necklaces around necks and in their arms .Some are completely bejewelled and readily available for service to help in managing . Another One LAKH paricharikas specialised in songs and dance and music . I know each of these skilled and unskilled labours’ names , interests , hobbies , their likes and dislikes with respect to food habits and clothing .I see to it they get those food and articles of their taste and liking time to time  to their satisfaction and happiness . I supervise and monitor all the work  given to these , I schedule their works according to their abilities and manage it to the best of the situation to keep the schedule on time without lapse and delay and to perfection .

Apart from the above there are another one lakh set of dasis whose work is to serve food day and night with a plates in their hands . Another set of Lakh dasis look after the guests . This is their work . I schedule their works and employ them appropriately .

There are paricharaks inside the antahpur [ palace ] and outside , apart from them , there are gopalakas , manual labours , security guards , whom I keep watch on and pay timely salaries to them all . I keep tab on the accounts of these all through my work schedule . Apart from paying salaries and auditing , I do see that their other needs are also taken care of and fulfilled and they live a comfortable life .

While doing all these I keep special thought process on what should be done to increase the wealth fame and prosperity of  PANDAVAS . I monitor the gains and expenses [ credit and debit ] of all the PANDAVAS , and I do keep them secret as well . I also control their expenses . Pandavas also have given me all these responsibilities of the family with utmost confidence in me . They go about their daily chores without worrying about all these and carry out their duties as worship to the LORD Krishna .

I too keeping my personal comforts aside , carryout these duties as a worship towards my husband with all happiness , And do not mind about day and night in carrying it out and this is my worship to the allmighty as well .

I sleep after Pandavas sleep and I get up before PAndavas get up . i never give  a feeling of having too much work to do .Those who carry out work with Love they never complain about the work .

This is the secret for keeping my husband under control , apart from these I donot think anyother methods or indulge in tricks . Rather I do not require any other tricks , What evil women resort to , I do not approve them and there is no happiness in that .

OH jagan MATE ! I know only this much and What I do is only This ! You know all these ! yet I have told all these only to carry out your order ! That was my duty ! “

Draupadi resumed her calm after this !

LAxmidevi SATYABHAMA became very happy with her answer and and Embraced her with all the blessings .

THese words of DRAUPADI DEVI are eternal and apply to all satvika stree . By treading this path of Draupadi devi MAHALAXMI’s blessings will be definitely there is what this story suggests .

Krishnarpanamastu .

Note : this story indicates clarifies many things about our culture and position of women in our society . It is a big fallacy that women were not educated . women had utmost education , they were educated to be good managers. MANAGEMENT of time , management of resources , management of workforce , management of money , management of material , auditing . supervision , scheduling , multitasking , training of staff , decoration , art of managing events on a day to day basis . if everyday affair was so celebrating , then celebration would have been more innovative .

Apart from doing all these giving personal attention to family members , it is no doubt every girl was trained to be  a superwoman !

Comments on: "Stree dharma–Duties of women !" (34)

  1. Nice post guruji 🙂 I like those lines in bold. every woman must read this .


  2. RayarSevaka said:

    Pranaams Acharya,

    During pitru seva or deva aradhana, should the women cover their heads at any point of time ?



    • Viju Rao said:

      sri kamal,
      covering head while puja is not vedic paddhati…its a muslim practise that got absorbed in hindus of north due to islamic influence for many centuries..coz in south in no ceremony/puja ladies cover their heads..acharya correct me if i’m wrong.



      • RayarSevaka said:

        Thankyou Vijubhai.. Acharya did mention it before. I wanted to see if there are any exceptions too as I got some info from someone today. Wanted to cross check before proceeding…



      • Viju Rao said:

        sri kamal,
        just to add in acharya’s article of ’32 apradhas to avoid while doing puja’ covering head is one of them.


      • RayarSevaka said:

        Vijubhai yes for men Acharya did guide me fully.. no vastra covering chest and head. only dhoti. But i am not sure if those 32 aparadhs are for stree too. Their worship procedure is different.



      • @Viju and K

        As far as i know for men.. minimum two vastras needed to do pooja.. one is dhoti (panche) and another is shalya (which is worn to cover the chest etc)..



      • Agree with Viju in this.. The only time women should cover their head with cloth is when they become widows and shave their heads….


  3. Sri Krishnaya Namah,
    Sri Hanumate Namah,
    Sri Raghvendraya Namah,

    Namaskar GURUDEV,

    Sir this is one of the superior post or text I have read ever on women.I have read till today only 10-12% posts only including branha Jignyasa and found this the most practical and effective for happy life for any woman.. in any condition.

    Thanksyou so much for this great post.

    Lakhs of panchang pranams to you for this..Sir,

    Thanks and Regards,


  4. pradip bhattacharya said:

    The Mahabharata Adi Parva clearly says that devi Shri was commanded by Shiva to be born as the common wife of the 5 Indras whom he had imprisoned within a cave for their arrogance. As Shri is Lakshmi and Vishnu’s spouse, this shows the reason for the sakha-sakhi relationship between Draupadi and Krishna. Nowhere in the Mahabharata is Satyabhama said to be an incarnation of Lakshmi.


  5. Respected Guruji,

    A wonderful article on Stree-Dharma. I have a few personal questions but I don’t want to post them here. Would it be possible to send you an email? Please let me know if that is not feasible.



  6. Many thanks for this article Chiraanji. I have a question. What’s the correct way for a married woman to identify herself? First name followed by husband’s first name or First name followed by Husband’s surname?


  7. Thanks to the MNCs, there is a drastic change in our lifestyle. Gals (people in general) hardly find time for themselves. The key word is Métro, boulot, dodo!!
    Métro – We hardly have time to just sit on the train/bus/cab and relax. There are so many things to enjoy in nature. Do we look out the window and actually notice the scenery, the colour of the sky or a bird flying?
    Boulot- We are in such a hurry to board the train/bus/cab that we skip our breakfast. We quickly hog some healthy greasy food from the food court and start work or skip breakfast and thrive only on caffeine. Then, we are glued to our desktops, laptops with eyes wide open!! (Our dry eyes tell us hey wink wink, gimme some water I m thirsty, at least pour in a few drops of lubricant.J). Now, our throat contracts and says hey I need water too!!! We are so immersed at work that we hardly hear what our eyes and throat says. Even if we hear, we tend to ignore its cry. Our superbrain says “Shhh!!! I m preparing this report, wait for sometime, I am too busy to visit the loo by quenching ur thirst”. Our UT sends a message that says “Welcome to the UTI club”.
    The clock strikes 1:00. Our stomach starts growling and starts flooding with acid. Poor creatures don’t know that all their tantrums won’t work. Immediately, we pop up an antacid.
    Once our pre-lunch official tasks are done, we go and have a quick feast. Otherwise, we fast.
    Post lunch – Our body slows down a bit. We tend to check our personal mails, messages on the mobile, read blogs …..By the time we realize, time flies by and we try to catch up to meet the deadlines and end up staying late in the office.
    Dodo – We reach home late and directly hit the bed. (In case we live with our parents, all our family members are asleep except our sweet mom, we are so mean that we are too tired to talk to her.) Many of us aren’t lucky enough to have a sound sleep. We have nightmares of deadlines and feedback. Disturbed sleep….
    There are also people who work when people in our country sleep and sleep when we all are awake. Imagine their plight.
    Oh oh!! I didn’t mention about our family! When we don’t have time for ourselves, I really wonder where I have to include the family factor.
    N.B: After effects of working woman are she is independent monetarily, she doesn’t feel the need to adjust with a man and his family, there are ego clashes. She grows horizontally and loses her womanhood quickly (poor diet, lack of exercise, irregular chums, STRESS, low happiness quotient all these lead to make u an eligible member of Menopause club at the age of 28.). When she is say 35 years old, she bids gud bye to the company as she is too healthy to survive in that atmosphere.

    A few blessed souls:
    I should say this “I am happy that a few like me are blessed enough to lead a balanced life in spite of these changes”. I am also proud that my colleagues (lucky enough to have people of my wavelength) and i have changed the attitude of people at work. Now they have started having food on time. Both positive and negative attitudes are contagious. 
    Everyday, I watch the birds leaving their nests and coming back to their nests, look at the sky, sunrise and sunset, stars and moon. At work, I go out for a 10 min walk in the afternoon. In the evening after work, i make sure I spend some time with my parents over the phone, chat with my excl. frnds and cousins across the globe provided they have time for me. I end my day by reading a book or by listening to the lullaby of my excl. frnd (this is once in a blue moon, u see people r too busy!!!).

    One thing is sure change is constant. It is in our hands as to how we want to live our life.


  8. True Hariprasad Alur Ji 🙂 🙂


Dear Readers , If you are asking a query , Kindly do not forget to worship SRIMAN NARAYANA and HANUMANJI and then write a number within 1800 followed by single digit number [ within 1-8 ] ,kindly Give time and current Place where you are asking query from ! , followed by number of virtual beetle leaves ,nuts and fruits you would like to give astrologer , and clear place ,time and date of birth . [take your hands off keyboard ] TOUCH a BODY part and kindly mention which part of the body Your hand is touching [ sprishtanga ] .... state your problem clearly , let us know what is it that your are looking for without ambiguity ! start and end with salutation to HARI ! If above procedure is not adhered to ,then no answers will be given !

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